SVTFOE (SkyXAnon) Chapter 1: The Journey Begins

>How did it even come to this? This thought continually haunts you on a daily basis.
>One second you're browsing the web in your tiny little shack of a home, the next you have a 2800 pound narwhal blasting through what used to be your living room... bedroom... well fuck it, it was pretty much all the same room with a cramped, poorly insulated hole of a bathroom attached.
>"A-Anon?"
>And now, by some fantastical act of fate you're here, living in the basement of an extremely odd Mexican family. Who upon your reflection, were a little too strangely accommodating to a stranger,even one who just had their house and possessions glassed by a magical interdimensional princess.
>"A-Anon? Are you in there? Helloooo! Earth to Anon..."
>It's not even the fact that you lost pretty much all your stuff that really bothers you. You pretty much had nothing of value anyway... It's more along the fact that this room is an upgrade. Your old house could almost fit in this damn place. Plus they have CENTRAL AIR!
>"I can hear you rustling in there! Hey! HEY! Open up homeslice!"
>But there's one thing you can't get off your mind. Star. You hate her. Well, hate is a strong word, but god damn is that girl energetic... Her capacity for wearing a person down to dust is second to none...But for some reason, you can't get her out of your head.
>"ANON I SWEAR! IM GONNA TURN THIS DOOR INTO A SYRUP PUDDLE IF YOU DON'T OPEN IT RIGHT NOW!”
There's just something about her that drives you insane. But, as much as she makes you crazy, you find yourself missing her from time to time. She seems so busy hanging out with Marco and going on all sorts of crazy adventures these days. She still invites you of course.
>"ALRIGHT ANON! YOU'VE GIVEN ME NO CHOICE! I STAR BUTTERFLY, PRINCESS OF MEWNI"

But she's out of her mind if she thinks you'll go anywhere near that shit after the first couple times. its not like you haven't gone. Its just that this girl almost killed you on 10 separate occasions, and you've only lived here for 6 months.
>"HEREBY DECLARE THAT THIS DOOR! YES! THIS DOOR! ANON'S DOOR! THE DOOR OF ANON! BE TURNED INTO MAPLE SYRUP, AND THE SYRUP SHALL BE STICKY, AND FLOW LIKE NECTAR
But damn have those 6 months been eventful. Hell, it beats living alone and miserable, shitposting on the internet for hours at a time... Spending days writing AND READING fanfiction based on children's cartoon shows.
>"AND MAY THE SYRUP GODS BLESS THIS SPELL, AND MANY SPELLS TO COME. AMEN! READY OR NOT ANON!"
Well...really, life here isn't awful. Wow, actually, even with the threat of total annihilation and being murdered on a daily basis, it's not so ba-
>"SUPER SYRUP-"
Wait WHAT THE FUC?!
>"DOOR TRANSFORM!"
If you didn't know any better, this sensation would feel good, if it wasn't going to be the death of you. All you can taste is maple syrup. Hmm... drowning in syrup. I guess its not a bad way to go. Actually, thats a pretty badass way to die. Well...You're going to have to take in a breath of death sooner than later, not much air left.

>"surberuebr....RRBWAB! SUBSSUSUCUKkK!!!"
>You gasp for breath like your life depended on it, cause it fucking DOES DEPEND ON IT.
You look at the wreckage that was your room. Brown maple syrup bukkake ALL OVER everything. You can't even tell where your bed begins and the pile of syrup ends. This girl will actually be the death of you.
Star! What the HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU! No wait. Don't answer that.
>"ANONN!!! You're... alive!!! oh man I am sooooo sorry Anon. Please tell me you're ok? “
Its ok, I'm sure its not hard to clean maple syrup out of my computer's power supply. NO BIGGIE!
>"ohh no, you are mad, wait wait wait! I can fix this, give ol' Star a chance"
OH GOD NO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW!? DONT! HEY, DONT YOU LIFT THAT WA-
>"ANTI SYRUP CLEANING WAVE!"
You didn't even have time to shut your eyes. But you're pretty damn sure you can see every vessel in them. You're dead, you know it. This is it, a flash of white light is taking you to heaven. It was a good life, you had tendies, they were crispy and buffalo style, things were goo-
>"uhh Anon? Are you gonna open your eyes any time soon?"
Huh? Oh... I'm alive. Cool. And everything isn't ruined! YES! My computer! My save file of Lederhosen Tycoon 2: Mob War is still here too! FUCK YEA!
 Wait...why are you even here? Aren't you supposed to be on some stupid beach trip with Marco and Jankie or some shit?
>"Uhhhhh....you mean Jackie??"
Yea yea whatever, the sk8er chick, the one who probably drank a case of growth hormone milk a day.
>"Oh... Uhh. Yeaaaaa... Marco and the gang went ahead without me, I wasn't feeling so good this morning. I mean, I know its saturday and stuff. But I'd rather hang around the crib ya know homie?"
>She winks and elbows you in the chest to emphasize that last part.
>You know... This wouldn't be so bad, you'd get a chance to hang out with the autism princess one on one. Its been quite a while since you two hung out together proper anyway. Ever since this spring, Star had been hanging around Marco an awful lot. You barely got to see just her anymore... Wait a second what the fuck is going on here?
Star...I don't know about this. Are you ok?
>"Waddaya mean Anon? I'm cool, I'm completely fine! SO FINE! No problem at all!"
Are you sure about that Princess?
>"Hey, don't call me that, prick"
Whoa, whats with the pottymouth, your highness?
>"Fuck you anon!"
Hahaha! Its so cutesey when you say it. As that big frog guy would say, "You sound like leettle bebby girl who is in need of stern talking to"
>"ANON! uggh! Stop being a turd.”
>Star pouts as she looks down at her shoes. Her facial expression betraying her normally happy demeanor.
Whats with that look? Is something wrong? Ohhh. Are you feeling upset about, ya know...them? Again?
>"Phhh whaaaaat? Nooo...I'm TOTALLY over all that stuff. Marco and Jackas-Jackie make a great couple. “
Sounds like a load of bull, Star.
>"Nonono! seriously, I really don't care that much...
Hmmm...ok. I guess?
>"Alright fine, I stayed home on purpose!!!!!"
Wow, that was easy.
>"But honestly, why should I have to watch those two smack lips while me and Janna draw in the sand like toddlers!? The waves totally sucked, I’m sick of looking at Jackie prancing around in her stupid “sports” bikini with her big boobs flopping around, and last time some old lady ACTUALLY thought I was Marco and Jackie’s special needs daughter because of my stupid swimmies! Can you even understand how humiliating that is for me!?”
The swimmies...Did they have pretty pink princess polka dots on them?
>"Anonnn...I swear, on my honor as a princess of Mewni... i'm going to slaughter yo-"
You know Star, those are fair points, bailing sounds like the right choice. You didn’t need to torture yourself.
>"Huh? Wait really? You don't think I'm a party shitter for bailing?"
Star...how do you not even know....Party shitter?...What? you know what, forget that. No Star, I don't think you're a shitter for bailing.
>"Thanks Anon. That means alot to me. Par-tay shitters really suck. Yep. I would know. Lots of bounce loungin’ under this girls belt"
So...anywayyyy... why are you still here again?
>"Uhhhhm...OH! Yeah...Anyway. I thought that since I’m aroundddd, ya know maybeee...we could hang out... go see a movie... annnnd get some dinner tonight?”
Yea sure! Let me know when Marco gets back and we can get some grub.
>"Wait wait wait! That's not what I meant Anon. What I meant is... just the two of us. Just uhh... me and you?"
>What? Did you hear that correctly? Did Star Butterfly just ask you out on a date?
Oh uh...n-uhh...huh...um, Star? I really don't think that's a good idea.
>"What do you mean by that Anon?"
Well, what I’m saying is, people on earth would find it pretty weird.
>"Weird? WEIRD? Hahaa! Cmon Anon, I'm the princess of weird, I eat weird fo' LUNCH! What's the big deal home doggie dog?"
Ok you’ve gotta stop with that shit.
>”Sorry.”
I mean like, weird in a bad way.
>"uh-huhhhh...ok...you lost me here."
>Curse this girl. This was already awkward enough as it is. Best to let her down gently.
Like, a guy my age and a girl like you... ya know....sharing popcorn, having dinner together... I uhh....  People on earth are very wary of stuff like that.
>"Wait, why can't we share popcorn? Is there some weird earth law?”
>God damn is this girl thick as a brick sometimes
Listen Star, I can't be seen hanging out with just the two of us, you're way too young for me. People on earth would find it really weird that I'd be hanging out with a girl your age.
>Yep. She felt that alright. You can see it in her eyes; in her body language. Son of a bitch.
Look Star, I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt your feel-
>"What? hahaha! Oh Anon, I understand. Earth has all types of weird customs and rules I didn't know about. You learn something new every day. Don't sweat it big guy!"
>Hmm, guess you're not good at reading body language after all.
>Star just stands there, silently looking down at the floor. She seems to be deep in thought.
>"Well, we should at least eat some nachos and watch some more of those nature documentaries. We haven't done that in like, forever. We still didn't see the one with all those adorable little bunnies yet. Oooh! Cute lil guysss."
Ohh yea…uhh. Nachos. Marco’s not here though, and I’m pretty sure my recipe isn't quite as good as his.
>"Nahhh don't be silly, I really like your recipe! You sure do like it spicy though Anon, you're my kind of guy. I mean... you're good at being hot, UHH. EATING hot... things... hahaaa.....”
>Star looks like she’s about to pull her hair out. Her gaze averts down to your feet again. She continues to stare at the floor in silence. That is until she suddenly throws her head back as she lets out a gasp, sending a waft of her pleasant girly scent soaring over the room. She peers back at you with a look of realization… Determination? What kind of face is that?
>"OH! I'm! I’m... going to go upstairs and check my phone, I uh... might have missed a call.  See ya in a little, Anon. BYEEEEEEE!"
>SLAM! Your door, which thankfully reverted back to solid wood instead of a syrupy pile, is finally closed again. The silence that coats the room is almost palpable. You let out a sigh as you rake your fingers across your scalp. This recent development with Star was not a good one. If you didn't know any better, you'd think that Star might have actually moved on from Marco. The problem is... you seem to be the new target of her affections. No. Not good at all. But at least you have the peace and solitude of the morning back. You throw yourself onto the bed with a muffled *thump*. The mattress hugs your body in just the right way, making it easy to relax again. Ahh... its really not so bad here. Its nice and air conditioned, you get a bed, free wifi, homemade mexican food. This place was paradise, and Marco and his family really made you feel at home. THIS COMFY full sized bed though! Man is this bed comfortable, and spacious. Totally room enough for two. You stare at the pillow that lays beside you. Its odd that you kept it there. Especially since you usually only slept with one pillow. It'd be nice to have someone to occupy that space next to you... someone warm, soft...cute..blonde haired...blue...eyes...pretty.......smile...

>"Mm hey Anon, sleep well?"
>There she was, the most beautiful girl you've ever seen. Her blonde locks flowing over those beautiful gems she has for eyes. Those cute little chubby cheeks, that warm and endearing smile, those supple lips. Her cute little blue nightie with that adorable little moon on it. Every part of her delicate form sings in the light of the room.She reaches out to you, her soft hands cupping your face. The delicate tips of her fingers trace your jawline as you stare into her mesmerizing blue eyes. Something inside you awakens. You feel a sudden urge to kiss her. Nothing else would satiate you. You'll do anything to make her yours. A faint knocking reminds you of the heart beating in your ribcage. It was too much to bear. You lunge forward with lust, the need to have her overtaking you. Her lips are so close to yours, you rush to bridge the gap.
>*WHAM!*
>”Hey Anon! Guess who just called me!
AAAAHhHuhhhhnng! HUH? What?!
>”Oh... did you seriously go back right to bed? You’re kidding, you know it’s like, 3:30pm, right Anon?
Uuggggh god fucking damn it...leave me be, Star, why are you doin-
>“Guess who just called!”
>Fucking christ. Can’t a guy get some damn sleep around here? You were just about to score with this super hot chick and now this noodle girl has to break into your room for the second time today.
My insurance company telling me they made a mistake and my house was actually insured?
>”Uhhhhh...noooo? Take another guess.”
JUST TELL ME ALREADY
>”Ok ok! Two words.
Yea I know, Star. Most people on earth have a first and last nam-
>”OSKAR… GREYSON!”
>The words, you never knew they could be heaven to your ears. You were off the hook just as soon as you were on it. Life is just taking care of itself. Couldn’t be better.
>”He asked me out Anon! We’re meeting up tomorrow. I’M SO EXCITED!
>Yep. Checkmate. Whew! Thank you creepy kid who literally might be a techno vampire.
Heyy, thatta girl, go you! I knew some guy would decide to scoop you up. I’m proud of ya, Star.
>”Aww thanks Anon, that's really sweet of you.”
Alright! soooo… I’m gonna go back to bed now!
>”What? Dude, I already have the cheese out on the counter, and you said you’d watch those documentaries with me remember?
>Fuck. You completely forgot about that.
Uggh. Alright, fine, let’s go. Did you get the habaneros out?
>”You know it, home-diggity-dog slice”
Star…
>”Whoops, my bad.”