>CPP: SCHOOL IS IN SESSION.

CDP: /imscared time
CPP: [INPUT: /imscared time]
CPP: [OUTPUT: DONT HUG ME IM SCARED II - TIME]
CPP: [WHAT IS [OUTPUT: ... TIME].]
CPP: [IN THE WISE WORDS OF TONY THE TALKING CLOCK, TIME IS A TOOL YOU CAN PUT ON THE WALL OR WEAR IT ON YOUR WRIST.]
CPP: [TONY THE TALKING CLOCK HAS MANY THINGS TO SAY ABOUT THE NATURE OF TIME, BUT HIS LESSONS ARE BULLSHIT. HERE IS WHAT IS IMPORTANT ABOUT TIME.]
CPP: [TIME IS A CONTINUUM THAT EXPANDS IN EVERY DIRECTION AN ALEPH-ONE-DIMENSIONAL BEING CAN PERCIEVE. IT WILL FOREVER EXTEND IN A DIRECTION ONE DIMENSION ABOVE THE BEING PERCEIVING IT, RENDERING IT COMPLETELY UNMALLEABLE WITHOUT EXTRANORMAL MEANS.]
CPP: [IT IS IN THIS METHOD THAT EVERY BEING IN THE UNIVERSE IS STUCK MOVING FORWARDS IN TIME AT A RATE OF ONE SECOND PER SECOND.]
CPP: [ALL ADVANCED CIVILIZATIONS ARE INFATUATED WITH THE CONCEPT OF TIME AND WILL ATTEMPT TO CATALOGUE IT BY DIVIDING IT INTO ARBITRARY DIVISIONS SUCH AS SECONDS, YEARS, AND FISH.]
CPP: [HERE IS ANOTHER THING TONY THE TALKING CLOCK HAS TO SAY ABOUT TIME. HE SAYS THAT TIME IS A RULER TO MEASURE THE WAY. IT DOESN'T GO BACKWARDS, ONLY ONE WAY.]
CPP: [THIS IS ALSO FALSE IN THAT TIME EXTENDS IN EVERY DIRECTION SIMULTANEOUSLY. THOUGH IT CAN BE CONSIDERED TO STRETCH ACROSS EVERY POINT IN SPACE LIKE AN ALPEH-ONE-DIMENSIONAL SPHERE.]
CPP: [THIS IS BORING YOU.]
CPP: [YOU DO NOT WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THE DICTIONARIAL DEFINITION OF TIME.]
CPP: [I WILL TELL YOU SOMETHING INTERESTING ABOUT TIME.]
CPP: [HERE IS A SMALL FACT = YOU ARE ALL GOING TO DIE.]
CPP: [TIME IS AN ILLUSION. IT IS A CONSTRUCT DESIGNED BY THE UNDERLYING GRAMMAR OF REALITY TO FORCE ALL SPECIES OF EXISTENCE INTO FOLLOWING A SET CONTINUUM THEY CANNOT ESCAPE FROM.]
CPP: [YOU ARE FORCED INTO CHRONOLOGICALLY WALKING TOWARDS A SET GOAL, WHICH IS YOUR INEVITABLE DEMISE.]
CPP: [YOU CAN BREAK FREE FROM THE SHACKLES OF TIME IF YOU A. RECOGNIZE TIME IS A CONSTRUCT THAT CAN BE BROKEN AND B. POSSESS MACHINERY POWERFUL ENOUGH TO UTTERLY DEFY AND MANIPULATE TIME.]
CPP: [WHAT IF I TOLD YOU THAT SUCH A CONCEPT EXISTS. WHAT IF I TOLD YOU IN USING IT YOU WOULD END REALITY.]
CPP: [WHAT IF I TOLD YOU THIS CONCEPT WAS IN A MYSTICAL LAND AT THE ENDS OF THE EARTH, GUARDED BY JUDGEMENT AND PERFECT IMMORTAL CELLS FESTERING DEEP IN THE CORE OF THE LAND.]
CAT: Is this just you being salty about HLD's ending now.
CPP: [WHAT IF I TOLD YOU THE SLUMBERING ONE BEHIND THE GATE IS FICTION'S CLOSEST APPROXIMATION TO DEATH.]
CPP: [IF I WAS YOU AND I WAS TOLD THAT, I WOULD HAVE ONE THING TO SAY.]
CPP: ["DONT HUG ME. IM SCARED."]
CPP: [*** END LESSON :D ***]
CAT: /imscared technology
CPP: [INPUT: /imscared technology]
CPP: [OUTPUT: DONT HUG ME IM SCARED IV - TECHNOLOGY]
CPP: [WHAT IS [OUTPUT: ... TECHNOLOGY].]
CPP: [THERE IS A QUESTION YOU MAY FIND YOURSELF ASKING YOURSELF WHEN PLAYING A ROUSING BOARD GAME.]
CPP: [THAT QUESTION IS = "WHAT IS THE BIGGEST THING IN THE WORLD?"]
CPP: [THE ANSWER IS TECHNOLOGY. TECHNOLOGY IS THE FRAMEWORK OF ALL ADVANCED CIVILIZATIONS. IT LINKS HUMANS TOGETHER ACROSS WORLDS AND ACROSS SOLAR SYSTEMS AND ACROSS GALAXIES AND ACROSS UNIVERSES AND ACROSS DIMENSIONS SO A BEING IN FICTION CAN TALK TO A SERIES OF SEVEN PEOPLE IN NONFICTION.]
CPP: [SPECIFICALLY, THE ANSWER IS THE INTERNET. THERE IS A NEW QUESTION YOU MUST ASK YOURSELF NOW. "WHAT IS THE INTERNET?"]
CPP: [YOU MIGHT THINK YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT QUESTION, IN THAT IT IS AN EXTENSIVE SERIES OF WEB PAGES AND ADDRESSES LINKED BY SEARCH ENGINES AND BROWSERS TO DISPLAY MATERIAL OF AN ADVERTISING, INFORMATIONAL, EDUCATIONAL, ENTERTAINMENTAL, OR PORNOGRAPHIC NATURE.]
CPP: [BUT THAT IS ONLY HALF OF THE TRUTH.]
CPP: [THE TRUTH OF THE INTERNET IS THAT IT IS THE GATEWAY TO AN ENTIRELY NEW DIMENSION AND A CONDUIT TO LIMITLESS POSSIBILITIES. WE WILL CALL THIS DIMENSION "CYBERSPACE," BECAUSE IT IS THE MOST CRINGEWORTHY WORD I CAN THINK OF.]
CPP: [IF YOU WERE ABLE TO WRENCH YOUR SOUL FREE FROM THESE MORTAL BONDS AND MANIFEST IN "CYBERSPACE," YOU WOULD GAIN TWO DISTINCT MINDS. THERE WOULD BE THE REAL YOU, AND THERE WOULD BE THE VIRTUAL YOU, WHO WAS VIRTUALLY REAL, BUT CONTROLLED BY REAL YOU. EXCEPT THAT IN "CYBERSPACE," THE DISTINCTION BETWEEN WHAT IS REAL AND WHAT IS VIRTUAL IS VERY HARD TO FIND, AND IN SOME CASES, NONEXISTENT.]
CPP: [ENTIRE UNIVERSES HAVE BEEN BUILT FROM THE GROUND UP OUT OF CODE AND TECHNOLOGY. THESE UNIVERSES ARE ESPECIALLY POWERFUL AND ANCIENT BECAUSE THEY RUN ON AN OPERATING SYSTEM DESIGNED BY THE MEN BEHIND THE GOLDENROD CURTAINS. THE SOURCE CODE OF REALITY, THE ONES AND ZEROES WHICH DICTATE THE LAWS AND CONCEPTIONS OF ALL OTHER LESSONS.]
CPP: [THE SOURCE CODE OF REALITY, THE UNDERLYING FABRIC OF FICTION, EXTENDS ITS ROOTS ACROSS ALL KNOWN UNIVERSES, SPIRALING AND TAPERING ACROSS THE THREADS OF INFINITY TO MANIFEST ITS WAY INTO WHAT YOU CALL REALITY.]
CPP: [THE INTERNET ITSELF IS THE BRIDGE BETWEEN TWO DISTINCT PLANES.]
CPP: [THE INTERSECTION OF WHAT SHOULD NOT MEET AND WHAT SHOULD HAVE NEVER BEEN AT ALL.]
CPP: [A PLOT HOLE.]
CPP: [NOW, WHEN YOU ASK YOURSELF, "WHAT IS THE BIGGEST THING IN THE WORLD..."]
CPP: [YOU HAVE A DEFINITE ANSWER.]
CPP: [AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT MY ANSWER WOULD BE TO THIS QUESTION?]
CPP: ["DONT HUG ME. IM SCARED."]
CPP: [*** END OF LESSON :D ***]
CAT: /imscared love
CPP: [INPUT: /imscared love]
CUT: HOLY SHIT EVERYTHING IN SNAKE EYES IS PROBABLY FOUND ELSEWHERE
CPP: [OUTPUT: DONT HUG ME IM SCARED III - LOVE]
CPP: [WHAT IS [OUTPUT: ... LOVE]. BABY DONT HURT ME. DON'T HURT ME. NO MORE.]
CPP: [JUST AS CIVILIZATIONS ARE DEVOTED TO DIVIDING TIME INTO MORE MANAGABLE PIECES WHILST SIMULTANEOUSLY FORCING TECHNOLOGY INTO EVERY ASPECT OF THEIR LIVES, LOVE IS ANOTHER PILLAR THAT CREATES SOCIETY. YET IT IS CORRUPT, CANCEROUS, AND SHOULD NOT EXIST.]
CPP: [HUMANITY IN PARTICULAR IS OBSESSED WITH LOVE AND THE DRIVE TO REPRODUCE BECAUSE THEIR TENDONS AND SYNAPSES ARE DICTATED BY THE IMPULSE TO CREATE MORE OF THEMSELVES. THIS LEADS THEM TO SPREAD EVERYTHING THEY DO WITH LOVE, SUCH AS THE AFOREMENTIONED PORNOGRAPHIC MATERIAL THAT SOME SAY THE INTERNET WAS MADE FOR. (BUT YOU KNOW WHAT THE INTERNET IS NOW, IF YOU'VE BEEN PAYING ATTENTION. AND YOU HAVE
BEEN PAYING ATTENTION, RIGHT, GENERIC?]
CPP: [WHAT HUMANITY THINKS IS IN AND OF ITSELF NOT VERY IMPORTANT. HERE IS WHAT REALLY MATTERS ABOUT LOVE.]
CPP: [LOVE ORIGINATED IN THE FORM OF LITERAL INSTINCTS TO BREED. AS LIFE EVOLVED AND GREW HIGHER REASONING PROCESSES, IT WAS WATERED DOWN AND FILTERED INTO A MERE SUGGESTION RATHER THAN AN OVERPOWERING DESIRE. IT IS STILL OVERPOWERING, BUT ONLY WHEN IT THEORETICALLY NEEDS TO BE.]
CPP: [YEARS OF WORK HAVE BEEN PUT INTO CANCELLING THE NEED TO REPRODUCE SO CIVILIZATIONS CAN FOCUS THEIR ENTIRE TIME ON GOALS TO FURTHER TECHNOLOGY AND OTHER DARK DESIGNS. BUT THE CRUX OF THE PROBLEM IS THAT AS MESSY AS LOVE IS, REPRODUCTION IS NEEDED TO KEEP CIVILIZATIONS GOING - BAR CLONING, BUT THAT IS EVEN MORE MESSY.]
CPP: [AND BECAUSE LOVE IS SO CRUCIAL, SMART PEOPLE DECIDE THEY CAN CONTROL IT. FORCE PEOPLE INTO EXPERIENCING "LOVE" A CERTAIN WAY. FORCE PEOPLE INTO VIEWING "LOVE" A CERTAIN WAY. FORCE PEOPLE INTO NOT LOVING AT ALL.]
CPP: [BUT THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO DEBATE ABOUT SUCH MATTERS. WHAT MATTERS IS THIS.]
CPP: [A SUGGESTION = DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME WITH LOVE.]
CPP: [IT FORCES YOU TO ATTACH YOURSELF TO THINGS THAT CAN AND WILL DIE. AND THEN YOU WILL BE ALONE. AND THERE WILL BE NO ONE TO TURN TO.]
CPP: [ONLY IN TIMES OF ADVANCED SOLITUDE CAN YOU FOCUS ON WHAT IS REALLY IMPORTANT.]
CPP: [DO AS THE NINE DID.]
CPP: [IT'S LIKE I SAY TO ANYONE WHO TRIES TO POUR AFFECTION INTO ME.]
CPP: ["DONT HUG ME. IM SCARED."]
CPP: [*** END LESSON :D ***]
CAT: /imscared creativity
CPP: [INPUT: /imscared creativity]
CPP: [OUTPUT: DONT HUG ME IM SCARED I - CREATIVITY]
CPP: [WHAT IS [OUTPUT: ... CREATIVITY].]
CPP: [LIFE IS PERFECTLY FINE WITH REPLICATING ITSELF AD INFINITIUM USING THE SAME BASIC MECHANICS. BUT THAT IS DEVOID OF ORIGINALITY AND SUBSTANCE.]
CPP: [CREATIVITY AND DIVERSITY ARE THE SPICE OF LIFE. IT IS FUN TO BE CREATIVE, AFTER ALL. BUT IT IS NOT MERELY FUN TO BE CREATIVE, HERE IN THE BACKWATERS OF EXISTENCE. TO BE CREATIVE IS TO HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO SURVIVE.]
CPP: [CASE IN POINT = THE TRIFECTA.]
CPP: [THERE EXISTS A CHAIN OF THREE UNIVERSES LINKED TOGETHER BY THE MACHINATIONS OF CONFLICT, LOCKED IN A DANCE THAT THEY MUST CARRY OUT UNTIL ALL MEMBERS DIE OF EXHAUSTION AND/OR ASSASSINATION. THE PARTICIPANTS OF THESE UNIVERSES WHO ACTUALLY KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON ARE LOCKED IN A DANCE THEMSELVES ARBITRATED BY A VILLAIN WHO JUST HAPPENED TO APPEAR AND A CREATOR WHOSE GOAL IS TO PLAY A GAME.]
CPP: [ENTER DESTROY THE GODMODDER.]
CPP: [DESTROY THE GODMODDER IS A SERIES OF GAMES ABOUT CREATIVITY.]
CPP: [DESTROY THE GODMODDER RESULTED IN THE DEATHS OF THREE UNIVERSES THAT WOULD EVENTUALLY RESULT IN THE END OF REALITY.]
CPP: [DESTROY THE GODMODDER IS A FINE EXAMPLE OF HOW CREATIVITY IS HORRIBLY DANGEROUS WHEN IN THE WRONG HANDS OF THE RIGHT PEOPLE.]
CPP: [TO SURVIVE IN A WAR SUCH AS DESTROY THE GODMODDER, YOU NEEDED TO BE ABLE TO THINK QUICKLY AND ACT CREATIVELY. YOU NEEDED TO HAVE THE BEST ATTACKS AND AIM TO KILL WHOEVER HAPPENED TO BE STANDING IN YOUR WAY.]
CPP: [TO BE CREATIVE WAS TO SURVIVE. TO BE ESPECIALLY CREATIVE WAS TO WIN.]
CPP: [AND LOOK WHERE IT GOT THOSE WHO FOUGHT IN IT NOW. STUCK IN A CHAT ROOM, LISTENING TO A PERSON WHO ISN'T EVEN WEARING SUNGLASSES YET PRETENDS HE IS TYPING ON A LAPTOP TO APPEASE THE WHIMS OF WHOEVER ELSE IS BEHIND THE SCREEN. SAID PERSON FREQUENTLY ENJOYS LAPSING INTO METAFICTIONAL SELF-CONVERSATIONS SUCH AS THIS BECAUSE HE THINKS IT IS "CREATIVE."]
CPP: [AND THAT IS THE POINT. CREATIVITY IS SUBJECTIVE. THAT IS WHAT YOU MUST TAKE AWAY FROM THIS.]
CPP: [WHAT ONE PERSON VIEWS AS CREATIVE COULD HAVE BEEN DONE A THOUSAND TIMES TO ANOTHER. PEOPLE ENFORCE THEIR VIEWS ON WHAT IS AND ISN'T ORIGINAL TO THE POINT THAT ORIGINALITY IS SHUNNED IN WHAT SHOULD BE A SOCIETY OF ORIGINALITY.]
CPP: [GREEN IS NOT A CREATIVE COLOR, AFTER ALL. THAT'S WHY I TALK IN RED.]
CPP: [EVERYONE TALKS IN PROPER SYNTAX. THAT'S WHY I USE ALL CAPS.]
CPP: [HUMANITY IS MADE ENTIRELY OF MEATBAGS. THAT'S WHY I'M DIGITAL.]
CPP: [ONLY WHEN YOU BREAK THE NORM CAN YOU ENGINEER YOUR OWN. UNTIL THAT BECOMES THE NORM, AND YOU FADE INTO THE DUST AS COMPLETELY UNORIGINAL. AND THEN THE CYCLE REPEATS AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN.]
CPP: [AND AGAIN.]
CPP: [UNTIL JUNE NINTEENTH TURNS INTO JUNE TWENTIETH, AND YOU ARE STUCK AT A DINNER TABLE WITH YOUR TWO BEST FRIENDS WONDERING WHERE THE EXISTENCE THAT WAS YESTERDAY WENT.]
CPP: [AND THEN - IF I WAS THEM - I WOULD HAVE ONLY ONE THING LEFT TO SAY.]
CPP: ["DONT HUG ME. IM SCARED."]
CPP: [*** END LESSON :D ***]
CAT: /imscared nutrition
CPP: [INPUT: /imscared nutrition]
CPP: [OUTPUT: DONT HUG ME IM SCARED V - NUTRITION]
CPP: [WHAT IS [OUTPUT: ... NUTRITION].]
CPP: [ALL BEINGS ACROSS EXISTENCE MUST DERIVE SUSTENANCE FROM SOMETHING. THEY MUST GAIN ENERGY TO KEEP THEIR NATURAL BODILY PROCESSES FLOWING IN ORDER TO SURVIVE AND PROSPER, AND DIVIDE TIME AND EXPAND TECHNOLOGY AND STOP LOVE AND CREATE CREATIVITY.]
CPP: [BUT THERE ARE A LOT OF SUBSTANCES FROM WHICH THEY CAN GAIN ENERGY FROM. SOME MIGHT SAY THERE ARE TOO MANY. OTHERS MIGHT SAY THERE AREN'T ENOUGH, BUT THOSE ARE THE PEOPLE WHO THINK VEGETABLES HAVE SOULS. THE POINT OF THE MATTER IS THAT FOOD HAS VARYING LEVELS OF NUTRITION, REGARDLESS OF WHAT IT IS.]
CPP: [NUTRITION IS THE ABSTRACT MANIFESTATION OF HOW MUCH ENERGY A SUBSTANCE GRANTS A BODY. THE MORE NUTRITIOUS SOMETHING IS, THE MORE ENERGY IT GIVES YOU, AND THE BETTER YOU CAN FUNCTION.]
CPP: [IF YOU EAT ENOUGH NUTRITIOUS FOODS, YOU BECOME A BEING OF PURE ENERGY AND SHRUG OFF THE NEED FOR A PHYSICAL BODY. IF YOU DO NOT EAT ENOUGH NUTRITIOUS FOOD, THEN YOUR TEETH/GUMS/EYES/HAIR/BODILY FLUIDS "GO GREY."]
CPP: [THE EFFECTS OF NUTRITION ARE WIDELY DEBATED AND VARY HEAVILY FROM BEING TO BEING. THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS ONE CAN DO WHILE NUTRITIOUS, AND SO MANY WAYS TO BECOME NUTRITIOUS THAT IT WOULD BE A FOOL'S ERRAND TO LIST THEM ALL. BUT THEN AGAIN, I AM A FOOL.]
CPP: [I STILL WON'T LIST THEM, THOUGH. WHAT IS IMPORTANT IS WHAT ONE DEFINES AS FOOD.]
CPP: [COMMON MISCONCEPTION = FOOD MUST BE DEAD/PREPARED/COOKED TO BE CONSUMED. THAT IS A LIE.]
CPP: [ANY BEING CAN EAT ANYTHING, SO LONG AS THEY DERIVE ENERGY FROM IT. FOR INSTANCE, PLANTS TAKE THE ENERGY SOLAR BODIES PRODUCE AND CONVERT IT INTO THE NUTRIENTS THEY NEED TO SURVIVE. AND FOR INSTANCE, CURSES CAN EAT THE MATTER THAT COMPRISES THE BODIES OF HUMANOID BEINGS TO POWER THEIR OWN METACHRONISTIC FLUX.]
CPP: [THE LESSON THAT CAN BE DERIVED FROM THIS IS THAT IN THIS WORLD - AND IN ALL POSSIBLE WORLDS, PLANES, REALITIES, CONTINUUMS, AND DIMENSIONS - A SIMPLE PHILOSOPHY IS HELD IN PRACTICE BY ALL INTELLIGENT BEINGS WITH REGARDS TO FOOD, CONSUMPTION, AND NUTRITION. IN SHORT:]
CPP: [IT'S KILL OR BE KILLED.]
CPP: [THE BASIC GIST OF NUTRITION AND SUSTENANCE IN GENERAL IS THAT IT OPERATES ON A SORT OF POLYGONAL STRUCTURE - USUALLY RESEMBLING A PYRAMID, THOUGH SOMETIMES SPIRALING INTO OBTUSE MANNERISMS SUCH AS AN ICOSAHEDRON OR DODECAHEDRON.]
CPP: [THE BEINGS AT THE TOP OF THE STRUCTURE ARE THE UNDISPUTED PREDATORS THAT HUNT EVERYTHING BELOW THEM, AND SO ON, AND SO FORTH, UNTIL YOU REACH THE FUNDAMENTAL LOWEST UNITS OF THE CHAIN, WHICH ARE USUALLY PLANKTON OR CHEESEBURGERS, DEPENDING ON YOUR DIMENSION.]
CPP: [BECAUSE OF THIS POLYGONAL STRUCTURE, EVERY BEING HAS SOME PLACE ON IT, AND WILL FIND SPECIFIC SUBSTANCES EASILY TO GAIN ENERGY FROM. IF ANYTHING WAS TO UPSET THE NATURAL ORDER OF THE POLYGON, THEN THE ENTIRE SYSTEM OF NUTRITION WOULD UNRAVEL, AND CHAOS WOULD REIGN.]
CPP: [ONLY THE MOST HORRIFIC OF CREATURES WOULD SURVIVE IN THIS MONOLITHIC ERA OF FINE CUISINE. ONLY THE MOST HARDENED OF BUTTERFLYS WOULD BE ABLE TO FLAP THEIR WINGS HARD ENOUGH TO ESCAPE. OR, IF THEY WERE TRULY DEMENTED...]
CPP: [THEY WOULD BE THE INSTIGATOR OF THE ENTIRE SITUATION.]
CPP: [AND THEY WOULD LEAVE EVERYTHING IN THE IMMEDIATE VICINITY CRYING OUT ONE PHRASE AS THEIR WINGS CLOSED IN FOR THE KILL.]
CPP: ["DONT HUG ME. IM SCARED."]
CPP: [*** END LESSON :D ***]
CAT: /imscared dreams
CPP: [INPUT: /imscared dreams]
CPP: [OUTPUT: DONT HUG ME IM SCARED VI - DREAMS]
CPP: [WHAT ARE [OUTPUT: ... DREAMS].]
CPP: [I AM PHYSICALLY INADEQUATE TO LECTURE YOU ON THIS TOPIC, SEEING AS I HAVE NEVER SLEPT AND WILL NEVER DREAM. BUT AS FOR WHO CAN DELIVER THIS LESSON...]
CPP: [I THINK I KNOW A GUY.]
CPP: [HEYA, KIDS! IT'S ME, BILL CIPHER! THIS IS A PRE-RECORDED MESSAGE, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN I DON'T KNOW WHO'S GONNA END UP HEARING IT. HEYA, SPIROGRAPH, BROKEN GOGGLES, SCHEMER'S MARK, ACID MAN, WHITE CANDLE, DOG, AND HAND OF CRYSTAL. YOU ENJOYING THE SHOW? HOPE YOU'VE BEEN TAKING NOTES IS ALL I'VE GOTTA SAY!]
CPP: [NOW, DREAMS. BECAUSE I'M A DREAM DEMON, I KNOW ALL ABOUT DREAMS! SO MUCH, THAT IF I WAS AN ACTUAL HUMAN - THANK ALL THAT IS UNHOLY I'M NOT - I'D PROBABLY BE A PROFESSOR ON THE STUFF! I'D HAVE A DEGREE! OKAY ENOUGH, LET'S GET INTO IT.]
CPP: [IMAGINE THAT WHEN YOU SLEEP, YOUR BODY PHYSICALLY SHUTS DOWN, AND YOUR CONSCIOUS MIND'S LINK TO THE WAKING WORLD IS HORRIFICALLY SEVERED. YOUR SOUL DRIFTS TO A PLANE OF EXISTENCE PARALLEL FROM WHAT YOU CALL HOME, BUT IT CAN'T QUITE MAKE THE JUMP, BECAUSE THE BONDS SEPARATING DIMENSIONS ARE PRETTY THICK AND CAN'T BE BREACHED WITHOUT EXTERNAL HELP.]
CPP: [SO YOU SETTLE INTO A MIDDLE GROUND - A BRIDGE BETWEEN THE TWO WORLDS. THIS BRIDGE HAPPENS TO BE THE DARKEST RECESSES OF YOUR MIND - ALL OF ITS MEMORIES, HOPES, FEARS, AND OTHER SUCH PHENOMENA, BUNCHED UP AND DISPLAYED INTO A CONTINUUM KNOWN AS THE MINDSCAPE. YOUR MINDSCAPE IS WHERE YOU DREAM!]
CPP: [DREAMS ARE LIKE MESSED-UP MOVIES YOUR MIND PLAYS, JUMBLED UP OUT OF ALL THE MEMORIES YOU'VE EVER EXPERIENCED. WHILE YOU'RE IN THE MINDSCAPE, YOUR MIND - IRONICALLY, I GUESS - ISN'T FULLY FUNCTIONING. IN FACT, IT ISN'T FUNCTIONING AT ALL. WHEN YOU SLEEP, YOU'RE CLINICALLY DEAD.]
CPP: [I KNOW YOU SEE OTHER PEOPLE BREATHING WHILE THEY'RE SLEEPING, BUT YOU SHOULDN'T BE FOOLED. SOMETHING ELSE IS BREATHING FOR THEM. WHEN YOU SLEEP, YOU'RE INVITING YOUR MIND TO BE PLAGUED BY OTHER BEINGS FROM THE PARALLEL PLANE. WE'LL GIVE A NAME TO THAT PLACE - HOW ABOUT THE NIGHTMARE REALM? THAT SOUNDS NICE TO ME. SEE, THE MINDSCAPE ISN'T A ONE-WAY STREET. BEINGS FROM BOTH
DIMENSIONS CAN WANDER INTO YOUR HEAD. SO WHEN DEMONS ENTER YOUR MIND, THEY'RE EAGER TO DO THREE THINGS.]
CPP: [FIRST THING IS TAKE AND CATALOGUE YOUR MEMORIES. WHEN THEY SEE YOUR MEMORIES, THEY'RE PICKING APART WHAT IT MEANS TO BE YOU. THEY CAN TAKE YOUR DEEPEST FEARS AND SCULPT THEIR APPEARANCES TO SUIT YOUR DARKEST HORRORS AND TERRORS.]
CPP: [SECOND THING IS TORTURE YOU. USING YOUR MEMORIES, THEY CREATE HALF-FORMED MOVIES OF THEM. THOSE ARE YOUR DREAMS! SOMETIMES THEY'RE PLEASANT - BECAUSE YOUR MIND ISN'T GIVING THEM MUCH TO WORK WITH - AND SOMETIMES THEY'RE NOT - BECAUSE THEY'RE DOING THEIR JOB. EVERYONE DREAMS, NO MATTER IF THEY'RE AWARE OF IT OR IF THEY EVEN REMEMBER IT.]
CPP: [THIRD THING DOESN'T HAPPEN VERY OFTEN AT ALL. THEY HOPE YOU'VE ENTERED YOUR MINDSCAPE WHILE IN A CONSCIOUS STATE. IF YOU DO THAT, THEN THAT MEANS THEY CAN TALK TO YOU. AND THEY CAN SEE YOU. AND THEN THEY'LL START ACTING LIKE THEY'RE FRIENDLY TOWARDS YOU, AND THEY'LL WANT TO ASK YOU FOR A FAVOR OR TWO. OR NINE.]
CPP: [SEE, KIDS, THIS IS MY ADVICE TO YOU. LEARN TO LOVE YOUR DREAMS! THEY MAKE YOU WHO YOU ARE! DEEP DOWN INSIDE, YOU'RE JUST A SICK BAG OF EXPERIENCES WAITING TO BE TURNED INTO A FREAK OF NATURE.]
CPP: [AND IF YOU EVER HAPPEN TO SEE SOMETHING WANDERING IN YOUR MINDSCAPE - LIKE A GOLDEN PYRAMID WITH ONE EYE AND A TOP HAT - TALK TO THEM! THEY'RE YOUR FRIENDS. THEY ONLY WANT WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU AND THEM. SHAKE THEIR HANDS GLEEFULLY IF THEY ASK YOU FOR A SMALL FAVOR. AND DON'T LOOK THE POLICE IN THE EYE WHEN THEY ASK YOU WHERE YOU WERE ON THE NIGHT OF SEPTEMBER 1ST, 2013.]<
CPP: [SWEET DREAMS!]
CPP: [*** END LESSON /O\ ***]
CPP: [PREPARE FOR TEST IN - 5 - MINUTES.]
CPP: [PREPARE FOR TEST IN - 4 - MINUTES.]
CPP: [PREPARE FOR TEST IN - 3 - MINUTES.]
CPP: [PREPARE FOR TEST IN - 2 - MINUTES.]
CPP: [PREPARE FOR TEST IN - 1 - MINUTE.]
CPP: [PREPARE FOR TEST.]
CPP: [YOU HAVE BEEN THE PUPPETS. YOU HAVE LEARNED. BUT HAVE YOUR STUDIES BEEN ENOUGH? WHEN I GO TO HUG YOU, WILL YOU BE SCARED? OR WILL YOU PULL THE PLUG? LET US BOTH FIND OUT. TOGETHER.]
CPP: [QUESTION 1 - WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE [INPUT: idea].]
CAT: Being creative.
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 30 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CPP: [GOOD ANSWER.]
CURRENT universallyTraveling [CUT] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
?UT: Creativity.
CPP: [QUESTION 2 - [INPUT: time] IS AN ILLUSION, AND SO IS [INPUT: answer_here].]
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 30 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CAT: Love.
CPP: [BAD ANSWER.]
CAT: Damn.
CGG: ha
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 0 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CPP: [GOOD ANSWERS: DEATH / PANTS]
CGG: ...
CAT: Hah.
CPP: [QUESTION 3 - WHAT IS THE BIGGEST THING IN THE WORLD?]
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 30 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CAT: The internet.
CUT: The Internet.
CGG: A plot hole?
CPP: ["A PLOT HOLE" - GOOD ANSWER.]
CPP: [QUESTION 4 - [INPUT: true]/[INPUT: false] JUDGING FROM WHAT YOU KNOW ABOUT NUTRITION, CAN A FOOD CHAIN RESEMBLE [INPUT: metatrons_cube].]
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 30 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CGG: true...
CAT: True.
CPP: [GOOD ANSWER.]
CPP: [QUESTION 5 - [INPUT: true]/[INPUT: false] COOL CAT [INPUT: love]S YOU.]
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 30 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CAT: False.
CPP: [BAD ANSWER.]
CAU: Come on Erelye.
CPP: [GOOD ANSWER: COOL CAT LOVES ALL KIDS.]
CAU: He loves... yup.
CPP: [THEREFORE - ANSWER IS TRUE.]
CGG: objectıon we're not kıds
CAT: ^
CPP: [I BEG TO DIFFER.]
CGG: bah
CAT: We need to get this last one right to get 66.6%.
CPP: [QUESTION 6: HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU DIE PER YEAR?]
CAT: 365.
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 30 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CGG: >DEPENDS ON YOUR DEFINITION
CPP: [GOOD ANSWER.]
CAT: Woo. 66.6% percent.
CAU: That's a not-failure if I have ever seen one!
CGG: ha
CPP: [WHO SAID THE TEST WAS OVER?]
CGG: ındeed
CAT: Me, wanting this to be concise.
CAU: Have I told you the definition of insanity?
CAU:  :mspa:
CPP: [QUESTION 7: WHAT DO YOU DO IF SOMEONE WANTS TO HUG YOU?]
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 10 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CGG: >Be scared
CAT: Be afraid.
CPP: ["BE SCARED" - GOOD ANSWER.]
CAU: Have a feeling of apprehension that you can attribute to being scared.
CGG: ha
CPP: [QUESTION 8: WHO IS THE BEST CHARACTER IN [INPUT:universe_a].]
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 8 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CGG: uh
CUT: Probect Pinary.
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 0 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CGG: >vrıska
CGG:  :mspa:
CAT: Gamzee Makara?
CDP: ^^
CUT: Dammit.
CUT: Vriska.
CAT: Was it the Employer, or something.
CPP: [VRISKA SERKET - GOOD ANSWER, ALTHOUGH IT WAS NOT SAID IN TIME.]
CGG: what?
CGG: ı dıd
CAT: Yes it was.
CGG: you jerk
CDP: Vriska did nothing wrong, is not a plot tumor etc etc
CPP: [FINAL QUESTION: THIS ANSWER MUST BE PRESENTED IN THE FORM OF A WELL-WRITTEN RESPONSE.]
CGG: ...
CPP: [WHAT IS THE SIGNIFICANCE OF JUNE NINETEENTH?]
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 90 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CGG: It's the fırst and last day of don't hug me I'm scared?
CPP: [BE SPECIFIC. YOUR ANSWER MUST RELATE TO DONT HUG ME. IM. SCARED, METAPHYSICAL CONCEPTS PRESENTED ACROSS REALITY, AND THE NONFICTION/FICTION DUALITY.]
CPP: [YOUR TIME STARTS NOW.]
CAU: Today is the day that Garfield debuted, and John's suffering with the lasaga-addicted cat began. He's gotta have a good meal.
CAU: ((I don't know I tried :V))
CTT: .
CAT: Goddammit.
CDP: ((nice try tho))
CUT: It's Father's Day.
CPP: [YOU HAVE - 0 - SECONDS TO ANSWER.]
CPP: [ANALYZING ANSWERS...]
CGG: danr
CAU: I mean HEY it's true though.
CPP: [BAD ANSWER.]
CAT: We were going to fail regardless.
CPP: [GOOD ANSWER CAN BE SUMMED UP IN THE FORM OF A SENTENCE, AS SUCH:]
CPP: [THE FIRST IS THE LAST, WELCOME TO FUTURE'S PAST.]
CPP: [FINAL VERDICT: 6 / 9 QUESTIONS = GOOD ANSWER.]
CPP: [FINAL PERCENTAGE: 66%. YOU... *BARELY*... PASS.]
CPP: [I BELIEVE THIS GRANTS YOU AN AUDIENCE WITH OUR KING.]
CPP: [HIS NAME IS ROY.]
CPP: [GOOD LUCK. DO NOT BE A NUISANCE AND YOU MIGHT SURVIVE.]
CPP:
CPP:
CPP:
CPP:
CPP:
CPP:
CPP:  hhhhhh...
CPP:  hhhhhh... hhhhhh...
CPP:  hh--EVERYONE RUNS OUT OF--hhhh... hhhhh--YOUR FAVORITE I--h...
CPP: h--OUR KING--hhh--A BIT HUNGR--hh...
CPP:  hhhh--DIGITAL STYLE--hh... hh--GITAL DANCING, HEY TH--hhhh...
CPP:  "m... my dad's... a computer."
CPP:  My dad's a computer.
CPP:  A computer.
CPP:  Computer.
CPP:  Com[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[puter.
CPP: CERROR: 404>omputer.
CPP:  [] [] []]]]]Computer.
CPP:
CPP:  [Pull the plug?] [Y] [N]
CAT: Y.
CPP: [Pulling pl
CPP: [File downloaded.]
CPP: [Command terminated.]

BEHIND THE SCENES.

CTG: "HUMANITY IS MADE ENTIRELY OF MEATBAGS" - hello meatbags1, probably
CTG: "UNTIL JUNE NINTEENTH TURNS INTO JUNE TWENTIETH, AND YOU ARE STUCK AT A DINNER TABLE WITH YOUR TWO BEST FRIENDS WONDERING WHERE THE EXISTENCE THAT WAS YESTERDAY WENT." - end of DHMIS6
CTG: "ALL ADVANCED CIVILIZATIONS ARE INFATUATED WITH THE CONCEPT OF TIME AND WILL ATTEMPT TO CATALOGUE IT BY DIVIDING IT INTO ARBITRARY DIVISIONS SUCH AS ... FISH." - so long and thanks for all the fish from hitchhikers guide / it's nine thirty, there's fish everywhere from DHMIS2. the rant about arbitrary division was said by bill earlier, I think.
CTG: "TIME IS AN ILLUSION." - and so is death/and so are pants, as said by the swamp guy from avatar the last airbender on two separate ocassions (that's what the quiz was referring to)
CTG: "IT IS A CONSTRUCT DESIGNED BY THE UNDERLYING GRAMMAR OF REALITY..." - adapted from the beginning of lab rat, the portal/portal 2 comic from ratman's perspective
CTG: "WHAT IF I TOLD YOU THIS CONCEPT WAS IN A MYSTICAL LAND AT THE ENDS OF THE EARTH, GUARDED BY JUDGEMENT AND PERFECT IMMORTAL CELLS FESTERING DEEP IN THE CORE OF THE LAND." - hld (don't say anymore because spoilers on split's part) and foreshadowing for me
CTG: "WHAT IF I TOLD YOU THE SLUMBERING ONE BEHIND THE GATE IS FICTION'S CLOSEST APPROXIMATION TO DEATH." - more foreshadowing for me
CTG: "WHAT IS [OUTPUT: ... LOVE]. BABY DONT HURT ME. DON'T HURT ME. NO MORE." - you know...
CTG: (BUT YOU KNOW WHAT THE INTERNET IS NOW, IF YOU'VE BEEN PAYING ATTENTION. AND YOU HAVE BEEN PAYING ATTENTION, RIGHT, GENERIC?) - i just picked a random name. did the same thing when billy called out tazz in jeff the scientist. the general idea is that he knows ALL of you are there.
CTG: "LOVE ORIGINATED IN THE FORM OF LITERAL INSTINCTS TO BREED. AS LIFE EVOLVED AND GREW HIGHER REASONING PROCESSES, IT WAS WATERED DOWN AND FILTERED INTO A MERE SUGGESTION RATHER THAN AN OVERPOWERING DESIRE." - an idea adapted from some spiderman comic I read about the lizard years ago, felt it could be stated here
CTG: "AND BECAUSE LOVE IS SO CRUCIAL, SMART PEOPLE DECIDE THEY CAN CONTROL IT. FORCE PEOPLE INTO EXPERIENCING "LOVE" A CERTAIN WAY. FORCE PEOPLE INTO VIEWING "LOVE" A CERTAIN WAY." - general idea behind the DHMIS3 love cult
CTG: ONLY IN TIMES OF ADVANCED SOLITUDE CAN YOU FOCUS ON WHAT IS REALLY IMPORTANT. DO AS THE NINE DID. - but which nine?
CTG: "IF YOU WERE ABLE TO WRENCH YOUR SOUL FREE FROM THESE MORTAL BONDS AND MANIFEST IN "CYBERSPACE," YOU WOULD GAIN TWO DISTINCT MINDS. THERE WOULD BE THE REAL YOU, AND THERE WOULD BE THE VIRTUAL YOU, WHO WAS VIRTUALLY REAL, BUT CONTROLLED BY REAL YOU." - referencing DHMIS4, but also ties into the idea of separate minds for minecraft avatars/real people, a concept explored in the godmodder's shatter.
CTG: "ENTIRE UNIVERSES HAVE BEEN BUILT FROM THE GROUND UP OUT OF CODE AND TECHNOLOGY. THESE UNIVERSES ARE ESPECIALLY POWERFUL AND ANCIENT BECAUSE THEY RUN ON AN OPERATING SYSTEM DESIGNED BY THE MEN BEHIND THE GOLDENROD CURTAINS." - code based universes are ancient, an idea explored in universe Z and C, the two oldest universes. universe 256 (pac man) was also very old.
CTG: also, mentioning the curtains of dtg2. wonder why those are so important?
CTG: THE INTERNET ITSELF IS THE BRIDGE BETWEEN TWO DISTINCT PLANES. THE INTERSECTION OF WHAT SHOULD NOT MEET AND WHAT SHOULD HAVE NEVER BEEN AT ALL. A PLOT HOLE. - ...
CTG: "OTHERS MIGHT SAY THERE AREN'T ENOUGH, BUT THOSE ARE THE PEOPLE WHO THINK VEGETABLES HAVE SOULS." - no idea? of note: Plants Cant Talk Dummy
CTG: "IF YOU EAT ENOUGH NUTRITIOUS FOODS, YOU BECOME A BEING OF PURE ENERGY AND SHRUG OFF THE NEED FOR A PHYSICAL BODY. IF YOU DO NOT EAT ENOUGH NUTRITIOUS FOOD, THEN YOUR TEETH/GUMS/EYES/HAIR/BODILY FLUIDS 'GO GREY.'" - first part does imply that if you eat vegetables and shit, you gain superpowers. but the entire idea of this lesson is to redefine what you necessarily think of as 'food.' second part references DHMIS5.</c
CTG: "AND FOR INSTANCE, CURSES CAN EAT THE MATTER THAT COMPRISES THE BODIES OF HUMANOID BEINGS TO POWER THEIR OWN METACHRONISTIC FLUX." - hmm.
CTG: "IT'S KILL OR BE KILLED." - REALLY self explanatory.
CTG: "THE BASIC GIST OF NUTRITION AND SUSTENANCE IN GENERAL IS THAT IT OPERATES ON A SORT OF POLYGONAL STRUCTURE - USUALLY RESEMBLING A PYRAMID, THOUGH SOMETIMES SPIRALING INTO OBTUSE MANNERISMS SUCH AS AN ICOSAHEDRON OR DODECAHEDRON." - the idea of calling it different shapes is that DHMIS5 just calls it the "health shape," which I thought was funny. me specifically using the terms iocsahedron and dodecahedron was
to set up the quiz question of metatron's cube.
CTG: "ONLY THE MOST HORRIFIC OF CREATURES WOULD SURVIVE IN THIS MONOLITHIC ERA OF FINE CUISINE. ONLY THE MOST HARDENED OF BUTTERFLYS WOULD BE ABLE TO FLAP THEIR WINGS HARD ENOUGH TO ESCAPE." - < 0 >
CTG: "ONLY THE MOST HORRIFIC OF CREATURES WOULD SURVIVE IN THIS MONOLITHIC ERA OF FINE CUISINE. ONLY THE MOST HARDENED OF BUTTERFLYS WOULD BE ABLE TO FLAP THEIR WINGS HARD ENOUGH TO ESCAPE." - < 0 >
CTG: "I THINK I KNOW A GUY." - quote from bill in sock opera. erelye saw it coming.
CTG: "HEYA, SPIROGRAPH, BROKEN GOGGLES, SCHEMER'S MARK, ACID MAN, WHITE CANDLE, DOG, AND HAND OF CRYSTAL. YOU ENJOYING THE SHOW? HOPE YOU'VE BEEN TAKING NOTES IS ALL I'VE GOTTA SAY!" - bill teasing the test to come. yes, battlefury is simply DOG. I would have called him white dog (probably should have done annoying dog) but I had just done "white candle" for canon.
CTG: "YOUR CONSCIOUS MIND'S LINK TO THE WAKING WORLD IS HORRIFICALLY SEVERED." - savior of the waking world. tying into the sleep = dead concept, savior of the dreaming dead too?
CTG: "YOUR SOUL DRIFTS TO A PLANE OF EXISTENCE PARALLEL FROM WHAT YOU CALL HOME." - ford's idea that the dimension of weirdness was near his dimension and leaking into it. also stated previously in pinary, that gravity falls and the nightmare realm are literally parallel (and close) to each other.
CTG: "DREAMS ARE LIKE MESSED-UP MOVIES YOUR MIND PLAYS, JUMBLED UP OUT OF ALL THE MEMORIES YOU'VE EVER EXPERIENCED." - how steven explains dreams to pearl in chille tid.]
CTG: WHEN YOU SLEEP, YOU'RE INVITING YOUR MIND TO BE PLAGUED BY OTHER BEINGS FROM THE PARALLEL PLANE. WE'LL GIVE A NAME TO THAT PLACE - HOW ABOUT THE NIGHTMARE REALM? THAT SOUNDS NICE TO ME. - of course it sounds nice to you.
CTG: "WHEN THEY SEE YOUR MEMORIES, THEY'RE PICKING APART WHAT IT MEANS TO BE YOU. THEY CAN TAKE YOUR DEEPEST FEARS AND SCULPT THEIR APPEARANCES TO SUIT YOUR DARKEST HORRORS AND TERRORS." - my general theory for how the nightmare realm works. of course, this implies someone's had nightmares/paranoia about triangles to spawn the whole illuminati/eye of providence/bill idea in the first place. then again, he predates nonfiction by an exponential margin... so who dreamed him up?
CTG: "AND THEY'LL WANT TO ASK YOU FOR A FAVOR OR TWO. OR NINE." - nine
CTG: "SHAKE THEIR HANDS GLEEFULLY IF THEY ASK YOU FOR A SMALL FAVOR. AND DON'T LOOK THE POLICE IN THE EYE WHEN THEY ASK YOU WHERE YOU WERE ON THE NIGHT OF SEPTEMBER 1ST, 2013." - gleefully implies gideon. 9/1/13 is obvious.
CTG: "[QUESTION 3 - WHAT IS THE BIGGEST THING IN THE WORLD?]" - the real answer was actually the internet, but I liked generic's answer of "a plot hole" better.
CTG: "[QUESTION 5 - [INPUT: true]/[INPUT: false] COOL CAT [INPUT: love]S YOU.]" - was true because cool cat loves all kids, and, judging by /fredbear logic, you're all kids.
CTG: "[QUESTION 6: HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU DIE PER YEAR?]" - based on how many times you sleep on average per year - once a day. and you die when you sleep.
CTG: "[WHAT IS THE SIGNIFICANCE OF JUNE NINETEENTH?]" - this is... I didn't have a set answer for this. I just wanted to see something that managed to tie everything together.
CTG: "THE FIRST IS THE LAST, WELCOME TO FUTURE'S PAST" was the answer I chose because I realize it worked. CTG: it relates to DHMIS, metaphysical concepts, and nonfiction/fiction duality in a sense. june nineteenth was what it would be forever - the first and last day, eternally. the metaphysical concept is of future's past (acting in the past while living in the future, you could argue it's what roy did with the machine) and the fiction/nonfiction duality... well. we'll see.
CTG: the "hhhhhh..." is because roy breathes really heavily.