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Crazy Horse Women

Dec 16th, 2017
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  1. >Be Anon
  2. >It was lunch time at Canterlot High
  3. >As usual, you were sitting near the snack stand, your back propped up against the wall
  4. >All around you, you could hear your fellow students chatting, laughing, and horsing around
  5. >But FUCK all of that
  6. >Today was a very special day
  7. >A day that only came around once in a great while
  8. >Mother
  9. >Fucking
  10. >Turkey
  11. >Dinner
  12. >Day
  13. >That's right
  14. >You got the turkey, the gravy, AND the motherfucking biscuit!
  15. Your lunch tray had three servings worth on it--thank god you had a man on the inside--and you were jealously guarding your meal
  16. >A couple of the cool guys at the table next to yours were looking at you and shaking their heads
  17. >If you listened very carefully you could even hear a bit of shit talking
  18. >But that didn't matter
  19. >Motherfucking biscuits!
  20. >You wiggled in your seat as you shoveled more food into your mouth, as happy as a pig in shit
  21. >Turkey dinner days were the fucking BEST
  22. >And that would have been that
  23. >You would have continued to eat your delicious meal until the bell rang, wherein you would have gone to your study hall and passed right the fuck out
  24. >You would have done that, if not for the sound of a whinney reaching your ears
  25. >Slowly looking up from your food, you saw the school's residential good girl/walking bacon strip Sunset Shimmer
  26. >She was staring at you with an uncomfortable amount of intensity, her cheeks comically puffed out
  27. >Your eyes narrowed at the sight as you slowly pushed your tray toward your chest
  28. "...Can I help you?"
  29. >Sunset snorted
  30. >This wasn't a normal snort though
  31. >She didn't seem irritated or annoyed or anything like that
  32. >No
  33. >Honest to god, it sounded like a horse's snort
  34. >What the fuck...?
  35. >Sunset took a step toward you, then another, then another, not saying a single word
  36. >You, confused as to what was going on, just stared at her as she let out a neigh, leaning down toward you
  37. >A neigh
  38. >She let out a fucking neigh...
  39. >Her face reddened as she drew near to your face
  40.  
  41. >Your face contorted in your puzzlement
  42. >What the fuck was she doing?
  43. >What the fuck was going on?
  44. >Was this some kind of prank?
  45. >Were you on camera right now?
  46. >Or was this some weird trick to steal your delicious mystery food?
  47. >As you pondered these important questions, Sunset drew ever closer
  48. >You, half-paying attention to her, did the only thing you could think of
  49. >Reaching up, you booped the possibly crazy girl on the nose
  50. >The effect was immediate
  51. >Sunset, letting out a neigh, drew back
  52. >Her face scrunched up, and you could see frustration working its way onto her face
  53. >Giving a toss of her head, she tried to lean toward you again
  54. >Realizing that you had found her weakness, you booped her again
  55. >Drawing back, Sunset let out a very lough knicker
  56. >Standing up to her full height, she did this weird "pawing at the air" thing with her hands
  57. >She then wiggled her rump before running toward the other end of the lunch room
  58. >...
  59. >No...
  60. >She wasn't running
  61. >...
  62. >Was that crazy bitch galloping?
  63. >Like how a horse galloped?
  64. >What the fuck is wrong with this fucking crazy ass school?
  65.  
  66. ~_~_~_~_~_~
  67.  
  68.  
  69.  
  70. >Be Anon
  71. >It was second period
  72. >You were sitting in your art class half asleep with a mug of coffee sitting in front of you
  73. >Other students were having a grand ol' time, painting and drawing and doing artsy-fartsy shit
  74. >Not you
  75. >Hell, not Mrs. Brush Quill either
  76. >Both of you were just kind of staring at your desks
  77. >You because video games weren't going to play themselves until five in the morning
  78. >Her...
  79. >You don't know...
  80. >Most teachers were alcoholics, right?
  81. >You'd be hitting the sauce pretty hard if you were a teacher
  82. >Underpaid, overworked, dealing with shit children like yourself
  83. >You were surprised half of your teachers didn't have bottles taped to the underside of their fucking tables
  84. >This meant that you weren't getting yelled at to make art
  85. >Which was nice since it would probably take you another two periods and some coffee stolen from the teacher's lounge for you to feel like a human again...
  86. >Shit was worth it though...
  87. >You managed to level up your fisting wizard to sixty-nine
  88. >Where he'd fucking STAY...
  89. >A very odd sound wafted through the room and made it's way to your ears
  90. >You ignored it, reaching for your coffee
  91. >Since you didn't have the gumption to lift your head to look at the mug, you had to do some good old fashioned blind groping
  92. >Come on you cocksucker...
  93. >Come on...
  94. >You let out a sleepy grumble, your face scrunching up
  95. >The noise came again, louder this time
  96. >If you had more than two-percent brain function at that moment you would have realized that the sound was getting closer
  97. "Come on... fucking..."
  98. >Your fingers brushed against something warm and metallic
  99. >Grunting, you wrapped your fingers around the cylindrical object and brought it close to your face
  100. "There you are," you mumbled
  101. >Letting out a yawn, you unscrewed the top of your mug and brought it to your lips
  102. >Come to poppy, life-giving fluid...
  103. >You were about to take a sip when someone fucking NEIGHED in your ear
  104. "Gah!"
  105.  
  106. >It was by the grace of god that you didn't spill hot coffee all over yourself as you looked up at motherfucking Sunset Shimmer
  107. >The girl was staring down at you expectantly
  108. >She had what looked like roses in her mouth
  109. >And not in the sexy way either...
  110. >...
  111. >Did...
  112. >Did some of them have bite marks...?
  113. >The bacon-haired girl let out a knicker, letting go of the roses and letting them fall down to your lap
  114. >You looked down at the roses, then at her, then at your teacher
  115. >Mrs. Brush Quill had her head on the desk, out cold
  116. >...Yep, alcoholic
  117. >Smiling, Sunset leaned forward and rubbed her cheek against yours, letting out another horsey sound
  118. "Hey, hey, hey! Fucking--"
  119. >Now very much wide-awake, you flailed a bit
  120. >The movement seemed to frighten the crazy girl in front of you since she let out a high-pitched whinney, doing a weird thing with her arms as she darted backwards
  121. >Slamming your coffee onto your desk, you rose up from your seat and followed her
  122. "It's took early... fucking dealiing with this bullshit."
  123. >With most of your class watching, you began booping the girl as fast as you could
  124. >Each touch of the nose made her face scrunch up just that little bit more
  125. >She tried to backpedal but you were unrelenting, booping her harder and faster until, with a whiny, she "galloped" toward the exit
  126. >You watched her go
  127. >When she had disappeared through the door you looked at your classmates, who looked as confused as you
  128. >Breathing hard, you threw up your hands
  129. "What the fuck was that?!"
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